Seth's Broadway Chatterbox: Marc Kudisch

Seth's Chatterbox at Don't Tell Mama's

By Seth Rudetsky

Transcript by FreakyMartian

August 10, 2000

Seth Rudetsky: Everyone says you've got a concert in like ten minutes and people keep calling me going, "Marc Kudisch cannot do a show, he has a concert today!" So what's going on with that?

Marc Kudisch: It's in Nyack -- big fuckin' deal! I mean, it's thirty minutes. New Yorkers are so fuckin' stupid. Hey, hey, eleven years I've lived in this city, I consider myself to be a stupid New Yorker too; think about it - it's Nyack. It's thirty minutes north. Everybody's already, like, gone off to work or gone home. It's thirty minutes. It's like, if we have to travel to - you know - to what - to the cloisters - we pack, you know, for the entire day. I'm serious. I mean, it's so stupid! God bless this city because it's so convenient, but come on!

SR: Oh my God! Here, gimme this.

MK: What?

SR: _____ the anxiety.

MK: No, but you know, that's why when you called me, and you're like, "Yeah but" and I'm like "it's in Nyack, man!"

SR: What's with the supposing things going on like, "I don't think he's showing up..."

MK: You know - yeah, cause I'm gonna go on horseback. It's gonna be like the movie Sleepy Hollow. You know - it's gonna be like two days - hopefully I won't see the headless horseman...

SR: Alright, we've gotta talk about Broadway. So let's go back. So first of all, did you do any big musicals when you were in high school?

MK: No. Yeah, one. One - I was a real geek in high school. I was president of the Spanish club for two years runnin' - yeah, and like I can speak a word of Spanish today - and my senior year... My brother was always the class president three years in a row and I was little Kudisch. Y'know, the only thing that saved me from getting my butt kicked was that I was Jeff's younger brother. And, like, people would pound on me, and then realize I was Jeff's brother, and then leave me alone. And my senior year I just decided that I wanted to do stuff because you know it was my senior year and I had always been in the same class with the same people for the last 12 years, so that's when I did a play. A musical. My Fair Lady. I played Freddie Eynsford-Hill. I suuuucked so bad but it was fun, you know? I didn't care - I mean, I couldn't sing, I couldn't do much of anything but it was kinda cool to get up in front of people.

SR: Well, how'd you learn how to sing? Were you, like - did you sing in the synagogue?

MK: Yeah [laughs]...that's where I got my shots! Aww, yeah. Singing on a pew in minor keys. That was an awesome thing.

SR: Pews? They're not called pews!

MK: What are they called in a synagogue?

SR: I don't know, but they're not called pews.

MK: That's what they call 'em - pews!

SR: Are you like the ______ version of a Jew?

MK: I dunno. Yes, I am.

SR: Like the bema. You say the bema. I mean, like, where you're actually --

MK: Not the bema! The bema is - that's the bema. Like where the arc is -

SR: Right.

MK: --That's the bema. But the seats are called pews.

SR: No, they're not!

MK: That's what they're called. They're totally called pews.

SR: Alright, let's get off of it. _______ Jewish-looking...[hysterical audience laughter] Where was I? OK, so college...what? Theater major?

MK: Yeah. Well, a poli sci major for 2 1/2 years.

SR: Of course. Why poli sci? What were you thinking?

MK: Honestly, I liked politics. I wanted to get into politics. My father was a lobbyist - my father was a lobbyist. It was an awesome thing - and I wanted to be a lobbyist. I wanted to go into corporate law and then lobby and then, you know, go from there. Because you know, in this country--

SR: I know.

MK: No-no-no-no-no, in this country it's the lobbyists that have the power. That's the truth. And I enjoyed watching my father have the power - it was a very interesting thing. He'd go and he would lobby and he would go to state functions and you know, I met the governor, and I met the senators and everybody through my father. He was the president of the ______ Manufacturers' Association. So basically all the large businesses in the state of Florida - he represented them.

SR: Did you know Jeb Bush?

MK: I never met Mr. Bush, but um...

SR: Mr. Bush? What's with the respect?

MK: What is it, Madame Bush? But our last governor - oh, God - I almost went to work for him, actually, when I was in college. I was offered a job interning, and I was gonna go to George Washington U. and I was gonna intern in Washington.

SR: Thank God you went into theatre. So what happened? Did you change your major and why'd you change it?

MK: I changed, because, like, at three in the morning I was building a set when I should've been studying for poli sci, y'know? And honestly, also, my favorite class in politics was political theory and here's why: because all politics is based on failure. All politics is based on failure. It's all about when this program is going to fall apart. I mean, it was a great class - it was a comedy. Because everything was about - oh, Long Term Economics. So it ran for twenty years - that was really good - before it fell apart. Y'know, Reaganomics was a short term plan - they were praying it would run a little longer than eight years when he was out of office when it fell apart, then we couldn't blame him, we'd blame him, we'd blame Bush. And it's true...

SR: I think both of them.

MK: Well I - well. Yeah, but the truth is, I just wanted to do something that I believed in, and I'm sure I'll want to do politics one day, 'cause I have a big mouth, but truthfully, it was kind of depressing.

SR: OK, so, speaking of depressing, you moved to New York, you didn't have a job. What the hell did you do? What was your first gig?

MK: I waited tables.

SR: Where?

MK: For four and a half months. Oh God, Broadway Bake - anybody remember that? It's on 77th & Broadway - now it's something else - I was a waiter during a lunch crowd. I'd get like fifteen people in one pop and everybody would order bluefish. I don't know why. I'd never even heard of fuckin' bluefish 'til I moved here and I'm from Florida. They have every kind of fish there is - what the fuck is a bluefish? And why did everybody want to order it?

SR: Were they all old women?

MK: It was everything, man. It was these guys, man: "I'll have da bluefeesh..." Fifteen people - they'd go bam! on the lunch crowd - and you'd be running around trying to remember everybody's order and stuff - and then they'd leave you a quarter. You know. So, I didn't make a lot of money doing that.

SR: Apparently. So what was your--

MK: And then Tamara: The Living Movie, off-Broadway. Do you remember that? The play where you followed people from room to room. It was a really wonderful play.

SR: So was it like a house that you followed--

MK: Yeah, it was the Park Avenue Armory. Aw, beauuutiful. 66th & Park Avenue. And it's this wonderful - you know - turn of the century armory that still exists as an armory and the front end of it - they use it a lot for antique shows, and lots of stuff.

SR: Galleries.

MK: No, not a gallery, but just a showplace for a lot of different things.

SR: Well, speaking of showplace -- aren't people naked in that show? In Tamara?

MK: I was naked in Tamara.

SR: I just wanted you to say that. Thank you.

MK: My first job in New York. Why did I get it? 'Cause Ah took off mah clothes. Yeah, I took off my clothes. OK, until -- it was a scene -- oh God...

SR: It was[n't?] necessary for the plot!

MK: No-no-no! It was in good taste though. It was very - it was beautifully lit, there were these candles, there was a big ol' bed. And, you know, like I said, people followed you room to room, and after a certain amount of time -- what'cha lookin' at me like that for?

SR: I'm just wondering what could've happened...go on...

MK: OK. I got into the show about 2 years after it started its run and it was really well known by this time, and so of course there was a lot of bridge-and-tunnel comin' into see the show now. 'Cause you know, people would, you know, "Oh, is this Tony and Tina's? No? Tamara? Italian? OK." But what they all knew was, "Mario. Ya gotta get downstairs for Mario cause he takes awf his clothes." So the top of the second act, I'm laying in the bed, and you'd hear all the heels - clunkclunkclunkclunkclunkclunk - just coming down the stairs, baby, and you'd be like "Maaaan." You know, you'd hear them all, and then you'd hear whooosh, cause all their hair would be like bumpin'... So they open the doors and it was so funny. I'm in the bed, and there's this big ass chair sittin' over here, and it's this big empty room, and you could just hear all the women - clunkclunkclunkclunkclunkclunkclunkclunkclunk - come over here. And the gay men would follow them. (clunkclunkclunkclunkclunk) And it was so funny, because I'm layin' in bed going, "Oh, God, OK." So I'm laying on my stomach and he rips the sheet off me because me and this other character Danté had had this big ol' drunken argument last night and I fell asleep in bed, and, you know. And he slaps me on my ass and I roll over. See, what's funny about this show is - you know, you think, "Ooh! oh boy! and I'm really happy to be right there to get the best view," but what people didn't realize right over there was that was right next to the chest of drawers where I need to get my underwear. Now, what happens is, I get out of the bed and I walk exactly towards those people because that's where the underwear is, and like, you're literally as close as I am, so if you're standin' there waitin' for a good shot, you're gonna get it and more. 'Cause I literally have to come up to you, and move you out of the way. So, you know, and it's amazing though how - what's the word - courageous people are until you get a little bit closer and then they're like, "There's a naked man standing there, and he's coming at me! Oh my God, he's gonna touch me!" I'm serious, you know.

SR: So why'd you stop doing it?

MK: Because I had, you know, three girls jumped into bed one night. See, this was what was wild, 'cause usually people are like this: the minute you do it they're like, "Oh my God, there's a naked guy standing in front of me." And you think "Ah! Nudity!" and then it's gone. But, no, it kind of hangs out for a while. So most people would be, like, you know, "Oh my God, okay, that's enough, we really don't need anymore. And then, oh no, don't move around the room, just stand there and be naked." But these three girls - just had a whole bunch of good time in them - and jumped into the bed. So we had to stop the show and I wrapped a towel around me and we got the guards to come in and I went to the director and said, "OK, I think I'm wearing shorts in bed now."

SR: Were you crying?

MK: Yeah, I was.

SR: OK, just wanted to make sure.

MK: "I was attacked in bed!"

SR: So your next gig was a musical. How'd ya get that? No matter what you're gonna look uncomfortable. I know it looks awful. Whenever I watch the video tapes--

MK: I sit all right, honey. Jews are good at crossing their legs.

SR: You gotta hold the hand there.

MK: I got it.

SR: Alright. So, how'd you get into musicals?

MK: How'd I get into musicals? Well, my first musical in the city was Bye Bye Birdie, which I did the national tour of.

SR: National tour that was Broadway bound--

MK: [amidst applause] Oh, please. Whatever. That was a bitter group of young people. It was! I'm sorry. It was - a jaded group of young people.

SR: Well how'd you get the gig?

MK: I got the gig - I auditioned, I wanted to audition for it, they wouldn't see me for it, because they just knew me as an actor. It was Johnson & Liff, and they had already cast me in Tamara - they cast me in another play off-Broadway, and I wanted to be seen for this, and they didn't want to see me because I didn't have any musical experience. And I really - hadn't really sung. But I wanted to try. And so I went to the open call. Literally, I went to the open call, because I figured, "Well, screw this! I mean, I'm gonna go to the open call. If that's the one place I can go and show them I can do this, I will." So I went for Amy Scheckter, the assistant to Stuart Howard, and she liked me, and she called me back in so that Stuart could see me. Then I went in for Stuart and did everything and he liked me and my agents called and said, "Yes, OK, now, uh, well?" And he was like, "Well, he was good, but, he doesn't have the musical experience that we need, so we're not gonna bring him back in." So two - I know, ohhh my Goodd - so - two and a half months later - after I guess they were not finding what they wanted, um, I got called back in by Stuart and finally he's like, "Alright, tell him to come in and be prepared and blah--" So I came in, and it was at the Broadhurst Theatre, and it was wild, because I'd never had an audition like this. Everybody was sitting in the lobby - and everybody was sitting up in the balcony - you could watch everybody else's audition.

SR: You mean the actors were sitting--

MK: Everybody! You had a whole audience to play to. It was really wild. I'd never done -- so yeah, especially, you know, it's the first musical I'm auditioning for in New York City, and like everybody I know is gonna see exactly how ______ I am at singing. And so I walked up, and I'm on sight, I'm prepared, I'm like, "OK, I can't sing as well as other people, but I really know what I'd like to do with the role and that's what I'm gonna show 'em." And as I'm walking and getting ready to go down that long aisle to the stage, Stuart Howard comes up to me and he goes, "OK, whatever you do, don't sing Sincere. Don't sing Sincere. Don't sing it."

And I'm like, "But, that's what I prepared, like, that's the whole character! Like, what am I supposed to sing?"

"Sing Lot of Livin'."

"It's four lines and then the chorus jumps in and it's, like, not nothin'! What am I supposed to do?"

"Don't sing Sincere."

Well, so now I'm walking down, and then, "OK, there's the Weisslers...ooh, there's Gene Saks, he's the director...ooh, there's Tommy Tune. Hi, how are ya." And I'm walking up to the stage going, "Oooh, I'm so fucked. What am I gonna do?" So I get up on the stage and all I'm thinking about is "I have no idea what I'm going to do." Thank God for a guy named Richard Riskin, which we both know, a wonderful pianist, a great guy. And I walked up, and he was like, "Hey, Marc, how ya doin'?" And I said, "I dunno, man," and he was like, "What's wrong?" I said, "They told me not to sing Sincere." And he's like, "What did you prepare?" I said, "I prepared Sincere! What the hell else was I gonna prepare?" And he's like, "So? Sing it! It's your audition." Thank God for him, because honestly I didn't know what I was gonna do. So I did, thinkin', "Well...what the hell. I'll get on the stage, if it's the one time I get to sing it on a Broadway stage, here it is, and then they can yell at me afterwards." So I did. And it actually went real well. Thank God. And then, you know, I finished the song and I was so happy because it actually felt like it went well. And then Gene Saks - if you don't know Gene, I think he's brilliant - he's wonderful - he's old time theatre. And a lot of people don't understand that nowadays. 'Cause Gene yells. Why? Because he's Jewish! And so he yells. That's just the way he communicates. So I'm, like, on the stage and I'm like [breathes a sigh of relief] and he's like "MARC!" Really loud.

"Yeah?"

"WANNA READ?"

"Yeah."

"OK. READ."

So we read two scenes. And he was like, "Great! Thanks." Thank you God, it actually went better than I had hoped it was gonna go, I was in a good mood, I was having fun, I was acting like an idiot. Which was good, actually. So then I was like, "OK, now get me the hell off the stage. Just get me out of here. Like, please do not give me any opportunity to screw this up." So I'm leaving, very quickly, up the aisle, and as I'm about to leave the orchestra, I hear:

"MARC!" Gene Saks.

"Yeah?"

"C'mere!"

[sighs] OK, so he called me over, I didn't wanna talk to him, and he was like, "Where are you from?"

I said, "I'm from Ft. Lauderdale."

"Really? You don't seem like you're from Ft. Lauderdale."

"OK."

Seriously, and he's like, "Well, originally, where are you from?"

"I'm from, y'know, Jersey."

"Where are your folks from?"

"My mom's from Detroit, my father's from Flatbush."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"What avenue?"

"Avenue M?"

"Yeah? I grew up two blocks from there."

"Really?"

"Yeah! Your dad and I. How old's your dad?"

At the time, I can't remember, I told him.

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"We grew up right around each other, same time."

"OK."

SR: Which audition part?

MK: What?

SR: Which audition part? There's a lot of chattering with you. How'd you get anything out of this?

MK: Well, hey, I don't know. I don't care, 'cause he hired me. So. And he hired me. And it was great. I loved working for Gene Saks. 'Cause honestly, he reminded me of my dad. It was great working with him. It was so easy.

SR: So for all their not trusting your singing it turns out --

MK: It was more about, well, I guess the way I played the character. That was what was important.

SR: Did you have a dance call?

MK: No.

SR: Who choreo-- did Tommy Tune choreograph you?

MK: No. It was one of the guys that was [one of] the original Kids in Bye Bye Birdie. Tommy, y'know, kinda choreographed his own stuff, and then this guy choreographed all the other stuff.

SR: So he choreographed all your numbers?

MK: Yeah.

SR: 'Cause I happen to have a clip, which I guess you didn't know that I had. I forgot to tell you. But this is actually your audition song.

MK: Ahhh. [doubletake] What?!

SR: ________ had a camera - Dateline.

MK: [laughs] You'd be surprised.

SR: This was on the national tour--

MK: Yeah, Betamaxes, right.

SR: OK. Two things to watch: first of all, Marc's placement on the bell for "sin": "Gotta be sin..." It's just incredibly good masque placement, as we say. We got that. And then you get this crazy, I dunno, chicken dance, I dunno what it is, it's amazing, and totally in character.

[Clip - "Honestly Sincere" from Bye Bye Birdie]

When I sing about a tree
I really feel that tree
When I sing about a girl
I really feel that girl
I mean I really feel
Sincere. . .

If you're really sincere
If you're really sincere
If you feel it in here
Then it's gotta be right!
Oh baby!
Oh honey!
Hug me!
Suffah!

You gotta be sincere - ooh oh oh
You gotta feel it here
Oh mah baby!
Oh, mah baby!
Oh, mah baby!
Oh, yeah.

SR: What the hell is this?

[Chicken dance onscreen. Clip ends, applause.]

SR: Isn't that cute? Now you're the only one on the national tour that wound up making the TV movie as well. That was kinda cool.

MK: Well...because of that... [laughter] Yes. I was the only one. I'm not quite - I'm not honestly sure why. What happened was, NBC wanted a reading done, a couple years later, because they wanted to see how long it was gonna run, and what the material was like, and if it would work well as a made-for-TV remake. And I got a call from I forget exactly who - I think it was Tommy who had recommended me, they said, "Bring Marc in because he knows it" and 'cause there wasn't a lot of time to put this together. So a bunch of us - Susan - Susan Egan and myself and they had pulled together a couple of people that NBC actually liked to do Ursula and to do the character of - oh God, what's his name -

SR: Hugo.

MK: Hugo. Thank you. And they just gathered as many people as they could to get together and, y'know, sing this thing. Read it and sing it through. And it was Robert Halmi Senior who does Hallmark - who does a lot of stuff for television now. And I read Birdie, and at first when I walked in there, they told me they were looking at Harry Connick to do the role, and he said he wanted to do the role. And at the end of it Robert Halmi Senior came up to me and he said, "You know, you really don't want a celebrity to do Birdie, do ya?" And I said to him, "You know, in all sincerity, I don't think you should, because if you have somebody like Harry Connick doing Birdie, then they're gonna say, 'Hey, look, there's Harry Connick,' they're not gonna accept him as the icon Conrad Birdie," which was what I thought was important. I said, "You gotta accept that character for who he is, and it's better that no one knows who he is so that that's all they'll know - is that he's Conrad Birdie." Um--

SR: And you got the gig.

MK: And I got the gig! They offered it to me two months later, I didn't have to audition for it or anything. Now, part of that also was Gene Saks directed the film as well, and Ann Reinking choreographed it. Now, Annie I had worked with. She was -

SR: Rose.

MK: - Rosie on the national tour. And Gene had directed the national tour. So I know for them it was an easy gig. Like they knew - I knew it, they liked the way I did it, and quite honestly, they were relying on me to help them remember choreography and all the blocking. In all sincerity - nonono, we did about a week of a workshop in New York, and they called me and said, "Listen: do you mind doing this? We need to try to remember as much as we can, we have blueprints of the places that we're planning on shooting some of these scenes, would you mind coming in and, y'know, giving us a hand? What did you do? Like Marc, what did you do? What were you doing at this point, that point. Exactly where were you doing the chicken, because now you might be doing the chicken next to a bush." Honestly, so it was fun though. I mean it was a good time because it was the three of us in there trying to remember the entire show for the week in New York. 'Cause there wasn't a lot of time to put this all together. And they were working with a lot of people that were on tight schedules like Vanessa Williams and Jason Alexander and George Wendt - all three of them were coming from different places - there was really no time for them to rehearse that much, so they wanted to have as much laid out as they could, to fit everybody's - y'know, we had six weeks total to shoot it, and everybody only had a certain amount of time in those six weeks - because everybody else had projects floating around it. So, it was really a matter of doing it and getting out of there.

SR: Why did you - after you did Birdie, the tour, that's when we first worked together - you took the -

MK: Forever Plaid.

SR: Yeah, why'd you wanna pick that gig? We did Forever Plaid out in Kansas…

MK: We did Forever Plaid out in Kansas City.

SR: Long time ago.

MK: Oh, God. Cause, quite honestly, like I said to you before, it was a great wonderful tour, and it was really horrible too. Socially, it was horrible. It was just very cliquey, it has nothing to do with any of the individuals - they were all wonderful people that were in that show. It was just really hard because it was young, and it was a little jaded and it was very cliquey and there were a lot of drugs on the road, and I didn't wanna do that stuff, and -- it was, well, but it was difficult. Because socially, I mean, for anyone who's ever done a tour, it's like, you're in make-believe land for 14 months. And I dated somebody in the company and it was not working out well and so I had to break up - we had to break up - and yet still work together for another eight or nine months. . .

SR: Ann Reinking was. . .

MK: Well, you know her, she's so physical - you know, I'm like, "Get off of me" - no. [laughing]

SR: That's awkward.

MK: It was tough. I mean, look, for anyone who's done a tour you know exactly what I'm talking about. It's not easy. And I was young, and it was my first big gig. So, for this being my first big gig, it was kind of a disappointment - but then, that's life - reality is never as we hope our dreams will be. And I just removed myself so much from everybody that when Forever Plaid came up - well, you know, Forever Plaid is a show about four guys that really care about each other and support each other. And I just was like, "I wanna do that. I wanna be in that environment right now." And it was. It was great. It was four guys - we got along so well - there wasn't anything - everybody was equal - so it wasn't like, you know, somebody, "Oh, this is my moment, this is my time." It was really about four guys working together with a lot of heart. It was great.

SR: Just happen to have another cute little clip. Very sweet. This is Night of A Thousand Plaids -

MK: Ooohhh.

SR: Isn't this cute? This was this benefit we did for Broadway Cares/Equity Fights AIDS, and the Kansas City - and all the different Plaids from the country - the Kansas City Plaids - flew in, so here's just a little clip of the way Marc looked in that show, with the weird comic dialogue before the song.

MK: I liked it.

[Clip]

Announcer: -- Kudisch, Alan Souza, and Richard Roland!

[applause]

Marc: I don't remember the intro - I mean, is it "hip, ha, hoo hee," or is it "hoo, hee, ha"…

Some Guy: No-no-no-no. "Hip huck, huck, ho ho - ha ha."

Hip hop hoo
Oh ha!
Ah ha!
Hip hop hoo
Oh ha!
Ah ha!

Hip!
I didn't know lips could kiss
Hip hip!
Hip! I didn't know eyes could flirt
Ho ho!
Ho! I didn't know girls could be like Tina-Marie
Di-di-do-doo-doo-doo
Hoo hoo

Hip Hip!

Woo woo!

Oh ho!
Oh ha!
Tina Tina Tina Tina Tina!

[applause]

MK: Wait-wait-wait-wait-wait.

SR: What?

MK: Do you remember? That was my coming out party! Do you remember?

SR: No.

MK: Yes, you do.

SR: No, I don't.

MK: Yes, you do.

SR: I was drunk. What are you talking about?

MK: When we were working together--

SR: This is my show!

MK: When we were working together, Seth was always like, "So when are you coming out? When are you finally coming out? 'Cause, you know, you're gay, so when are you coming out?"

SR: That is so not true, but go on.

MK: But don't you remember? What was it, like September something, when we came in for Night of 1000, you're like, "That's gonna be your coming out party."

SR: No, I didn't - what are you talking about?

MK: "That's gonna be your coming out party."

SR: So? What's the hold-up? I'm just asking.

MK: I came out. You missed it.

SR: [feigns crying] I'll just go up to Nyack. [Marc cracks up] On to Beauty and the Beast - you did, like, Muscle Man in that show.

MK: Yes, I did.

SR: Now what was that like? That's sort of an easier role because you don't have to work with a fork in your back.

MK: You know something, there is no easy job. The easiest job in that show is being dull. That's the easiest job. 'Cause if you're not a utensil - if you're not a pot, if you're not a candle - or if you're not, like, you know, really Jewish, and, y'know, a hairy beast - then you're - well, I'm sorry - Jews are hairy. We are, we're hairy people.

SR: Go on!

MK: OK. No wait, so, Gaston - it was a great costume, but the problem with that role was that everything was choreographed to music and everything had choreography and everything was to music, and so we had like four different conductors that were happening every week. We had, you know, three associates and one major conductor. And everyone had their own tempo and rhythm. So every night you'd walk out there and there'd be a different rhythm or a different tempo and you're like, "Excuse me, there's only so long that I can jump in the air and stay there before I land. So can we --" [snaps fingers]

"Well, I'm trying to make it pompous."

"OK, that's an attitude, it is not a rhythm."

Seriously, I'm like, "That's my job. I will be the pompous one."

"I'm only trying to help."

"Doooon't."

SR: Now, wasn't there a mishap? What was the Mrs. Potts mishap?

MK: Oh yeah, Mrs. Potts. OK, so, it was Cass Morgan at the time - there were five of us that came in and replaced all the principals when they opened Los Angeles. And Cass Morgan was Mrs. Potts. So they're all on stage. And I'm standing in the wings watching this. It's Cass Morgan, Sarah Uriarte, Jeff McCarthy's the Beast, Heath Lamberts is the original Cogsworth, and they all come running on and down the stairs cause it's the first time they're meeting Belle. OK. Those costumes - y'know, like - are hard enough because you know, poor Mrs. Potts, literally, the entire show, is doing this. She's doing this. And she's gotta keep her arm there. And there's nothin' supportin' her, she's doin' it on her own, which is why everybody's in therapy after doing that show. I mean, I'm serious, doing this all eight shows a week, it looks simple but it really just destroyed all of the women that did it. So she's comin' down the stairs, and she loses her balance. What is she gonna do? She don't got any arms! So Mrs. Potts - "Ooh!" - falls down. OK, now, think about it. No one else on the stage has arms either. OK? There's Lumiere - his hands are on fire; OK, Cogsworth, he can't bend, he's got this thing on and stuff; and poor Sarah Uriarte, "Oh! Mrs. Potts! Mrs. Potts!" trying to pick this heavy ass woman up! So Sarah was kneeling, got down on her feet, picked Cass up, and Cass looked at her and went, "Oh! Thank you dear!"

SR: Alright, alright, alright, I must move on, alright. So you're - you're downstage, Marc.

MK: That's funny.

SR: (after brief intro music) OK, please welcome to to the stage the rhythm master, Michael John LaChuisa!

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